Monday, November 30, 2009

Apple Cider and Medicine

Good evening everyone,

Well, here it is. Another Monday night, another runny nose, but there is a twist with this one. I have the biggest headache ever. Thankfully the meds are taking care of it, I just cannot focus on getting my lines for my presentation tomorrow. It may be fun. The other part of this shannagains is that the headache is tensing up my neck. I dont remember if I have ever had this bad of a headache. But that is enough complaining for one evening.
So, I have been relying on God a lot more lately. Most of today, I have been reading my script, its 20 verses from Ezekiel. The remnant is out in Babylon, and God is tell Ezekiel to tell the people that He is still God. Yes God is still God. Its one of those, yea, I can see where Israel is coming from. Then I hear a small voice saying, "Daniel, I am still God." When everything is not what you think it should be, God has a plan to bring you back to the promised land. I know that when God is speaking to Israel, I can take it and know he is talking to me.
It is still a day to day thing, trying not to get bitter. I know there is someone out there, somewhere in this world, that God has for me. I just am left wondering, do I need to change how easily I forgive people. I have been praying about this, since March and I know that God has forgiven me when ever I ask for it. It is one of those, I know I need to do this, but I have been hurt by trusting people who have shown themselves not trustworthy. I know I am not trustworthy. So, am I going to be like the king who lets the debt go, or the slave who was forgiven for lots, and wants everything from another. This is hard to say, I will leave myself vulnerable, for the sake for Christ. For my life is redeemed from an unrepayable debt.
Right now, literally, as I wrote that, bitterness lost a grip on my heart. I finally just gave it to God. Prayerfully, I enter this next part of my life with Adonai, and only holding onto him.
God Bless
Dan Van.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Promises

Promises are meant to be kept. It hurts more to be lied to about it being broken though. I poured out everything I had. Fought with every fiber of my being. I have been left thinking, Am I trusting of those who have hurt me in the past?

God is with me. Giving me peace, my place to hide, fulfilling my deepest needs. It is still a daily struggle to walk with Him with all that I am, but fortunately He is uber forgiving. He has paid for my sins, and promised to never leave me. He is close, even when I am far. I feel Him with me every morning. The blessing of just feeling His presence is amazing. I thank Him for where He has put me.

What happens next in my life? Not sure, but do know that it will be fun.

Peace,
Dan Van

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Boredom. It sucks. Campus is empty, most have gone to the volleyball game, which I wanted to go to, but either people had rides, or no room to take me. So I am here, in my room. Gah. SO BORED. I have already planned what I am taking home this weekend. Wait, I Get to go home!!!! This is so exciting. But I am going to do something productive.
God Bless.